Denmark is the kind of place that nobody can dislike. Pastry and sunshine are the power-couple of all travelling prerequisites.
But, what you might not know are a few of the things you might want to avoid when in the land of licorice, Lego and mermaid look-alikes.
But don't even worry about it, I'm as selfless as I am small, and I've made a quick list that should keep you at least 85% alive during your stay in Denmark.
Don’t try crossing the street without the little green man. This sounds very self-explanatory, but we’re all the same. We all get a bit cocky and brave at home and think we know best. We know nothing here. (Literally, nothing. Who has right of way? Bikes? Humans? Small dogs? It’s a circus out there).
Do sun-safe up. The city is void of a lot of shade (parks aside, I’ll get to them in a minute), and you’ll need water, sunglasses and any ridiculous bucket-hat-with-a-optional-drawstring you can find in order to not throw a tantrum in the middle of the street (me).
Don’t buy coffee (if you’re of Australian blood). They’re fine to drink, but jolly expensive, and honestly not worth the buzz. Pop a few skittles under your tongue and pull out leg hairs when you get sleepy like everybody else.
(See above: Grans on an ice-cream crawl)
Do walk it. Providing,of course that you have read and adhered to my above tip (don’t slack on your skincare. European sun isn’t Australian levels of instant skin cancer, but if you don’t want to look like a leather purse at forty, just slap on some SPF40+.)
Don’t expect to get a front-row seat to anything. There are miles of people wanting a photo with the thing, so as tempting as it is to use your elbows, just calm yourself and wait your turn. You’re not the only tourist wanting a go-to Insta dp, y’know.
Do pretend to be cultured. Just for the day. Hit the palaces, the museums, the art galleries, whatever wouldn’t normally tickle you in a place that you’re familiar with. I’m a serial twitcher, I get bored fairly easily, but even I become a professional historian/plaque-reader/condescending know-it-all when I go to a new place. We particularly enjoyed Frederiksborg Palace in Hillerød and the portrait exhibition there.
Don’t walk into a supermarket and head straight for the right-hand-side. You will meet a wall. Supermarkets start on the left and work their way around, sorry. Like roundabouts. Also worth noting.
Do a park. All of a park. Any park will do! They’re all equally top-notch: shady, full of cushiony grass you just can’t walk past without rolling in, and as clean as we wish our parks were. A few we particularly enjoyed are:
l The walk around Kastellet
l Kongens Have
You’ll love Denmark, (if you stick to this rigid and immovable series of rules.)